The 2 Simple Reasons Why Some Issues Don't Seem To Heal No Matter How Much You 'Work' Them. . .

...and How You Can Quickly Become A Facilitator Who Is Able To Help Heal Those Issues, With Other People -- And On Yourself.

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Dear Warrior Brother/Woman Within Sister,

Have you ever seen this:

A person has an issue, and works it over and over and over. But no matter what they do, the issue doesn't seem to change.

Why is that?

Well, I've thought about that question a lot over the last 17 years, as I've run Shadow Work, Carpet Work, facilitation trainings, Inner King Trainings and one-on-one sessions all over the US, Cananda, England and South Africa.

I've needed to find an answer to that question, so I could help the people who were paying me top dollar for my facilitation.

Well, I've found an answer that really seems to work, and I'd like to share it with you now.

There are two simple reasons that people don't make the "Deep Changes" that they are often wishing they could.

Let's look at those reasons one at a time:


Reason #1: "Deep Risks" Stop Change From Happening

The truth is, no matter how much a person wants change to happen, their psyche won't let them change if the change seems too risky to some deep, hidden part of them.

Facilitators will often ask "What's at risk?" and "Are you willing to take that risk?" during a process. That's good as far as it goes, but it is often not enough to really get at the Deep Risks that are holding the person back.

If you can't address the Deep Risk, the process will seem "slow as molassas," and it will feel like you, the facilitator, are having to do all the work. You or the group may even confront the participant about his or her unconscious resistance, which may motivate the participant to "perform" a good process (usually anger work), but which won't create a lasting change.

Put another way, you have to know how to get the parts of a person that think that "it's too risky" to change to "get on board" with allowing change to happen.


•What you need to UNDERSTAND:

If there's a Deep Risk that the facilitator has not  addressed, then a person will not change.

You have to help get the parts of a person that think that "it's too risky" to be in favor of allowing change to happen.

Simply badgering a person or pushing them to take the risk will not have a lasting positive effect.

Until you are able to address and transform the Deep Risk, change will not happen.

At the "Deep Change Facilitation Training," You'll Discover:

- The faces of Deep Risk. Deep Risks show up in several very different ways. You'll find out how to spot them right away, and exactly what to do with them, and

- How to identify when people are holding on to an issue because of Deep Risks that need to be addressed, and

- How to help people change their identities from "someone who is screwed up" to "someone who has taken care of themselves well and survived dangerous situations," and

- How to get the Deep Risk "on your team" to help the participant, and

- How to help people transform the restricting energy of the Deep Risk into power, focus, connection, and blessing, and. . .

- How to help people take those energies out into their lives.

As a bonus, you'll also discover how to find, heal, and get the energy out of your own expressions of Deep Risk.

In my experience, 98% of facilitators, even the savvy ones who think they may know this, can do a much better job applying it (and most barely scratch the surface). Once you understand how to work with the Deep Risks, you'll be able to get old issues to move toward healing with surprising ease.


Reason #2: "Deep Love" Stops Change From Happening

If you had this choice, which option would you take?

Option 1: Knowing you are a good, loving person, loyal to those you love, but unhappy, or

Option 2: Being happy, but thinking you are an unloving, disloyal person.

It's my experience that people will take Option 1, "Knowing they are a good, loving person, loyal to those they love, but unhappy," every single time.

That's an expresson of Deep Love. It's painful, but it's loving.

Put another way: We often carry painful issues, and refuse to let them go, as a way of showing Deep Love for someone. Until that deep love is addressed, no amount of process work with make an issue heal.

The 5 Reasons We Carry Pain to Show Deep Love

1) They have the pain, so you do too. There may be someone you love who had a certain kind of pain, and you may have reproduced it in yourself as a way of trying to prove you are loving them.

2) You're trying to heal it for them. If someone you love suffers, you may have reproduced their pain in yourself as a way of trying to carry and heal it for them.

3) You think you've lost your connection. You may have thought that you lost your loving connection to someone through some experience of abuse, and may be reproducing the pain of the abuse as a way of trying to feel your connection with that person in the only way you can.

4) "It's wrong not to suffer, in my family!" You may have simply felt, on some core level, that it was wrong, disrespectful, or unloving to be happier than someone else in your family. So you unconsciously decided to "suffer with them" as a way of showing solidarity and love.

5) You fear you won't belong or fit if you aren't in pain. Think of it this way -- if , as a child, you completely embodied the belief that you were perfectly blessed and perfectly connected at every moment, you probably wouldn't have fit in your family system. In order to know they fit into their family and that they are a loving member of it, children take on some pain.

These are all painful ways of expressing Deep Love.

And if someone has worked an issue over and over, but it still doesn't change, it's very likey that a Deep Love, expressed in a painful way, is what's holding them back.

As facilitators (and as people who want to live happy lives), we have to be able to find the love that is motivating the person to hang on to their painful issue.


•What you need to UNDERSTAND:
If you have the choice between being happy and being loving, you'll take being LOVING every time, even if that means carrying painful issues, and not healing them.

People don't change because the pain they carry is an unacknowledged way of showing Deep Love for someone else.

As a faciliator, you must help the participant feel and trust the pleasurable love that is beneath that issue, or the person will not change.


At the "Deep Change Facilitation Training," You'll Discover:

-  How to identify when people are holding on to an issue as a way of showing Deep Love, and

- How to help people change their identities from that of "someone who is screwed up" to "someone who is deeply loving," and

- How to help people experience and trust the pleasurable love that underlies the painful issue they are carrying, and

- How to help people find the blessing that is in that love, and to take that blessing with them out into their lives.

And as a bonus, you'll also discover how to find, and heal, your own painful expressions of Deep Love.

Almost all the carpet work I run now is based on these two core ideas. And the people who work with me say that my work is more powerful, more lasting, and more gentle than ever before.

If you'd like to be able to facilitate people through these deeper blocks -- and be able to quickly get through those blocks yourself -- then you may want to come to this training.

 
What People Say about The Deep Change Facilitation Training

"For a person like me who is constantantly working on myself, having a deeper level to delve into is a must. I recommend the Deep Change Facilitation Training to anyone who is serious about making real changes in their lives and in the lives of others."
    - Mimi Sanderson, Chicago, IL

"Deep Change work definitely takes personal growth/healing work to another level of maturity and evolution. It clarifies and brings to the heart the incredible love that underlies our pain. Truly blessing work -- gentle, respectful, and highly effective."
    - E.F., Wisconsin

"I learned, enjoyed, and even grew taller! Deep Change facilitation puts an entirely different spin on our work -- I highly recommend it!"
    - Steve Kahn, Chicago, IL

"The Deep Change Facilitation Training is the second facilitation training that I have attended led by Dmitri. The methods he employs are excellent, and his style fully engaged me throughout the weekend. I would encourage anyone who feels stuck in their personal growth work, or anyone who is looking for additional tools, to check him out."
    - Tom H., Chicago, IL

"The Deep Change Facilitation Training is invaluable if you feel stuck on the same issue, or want more tools to help other people who feel stuck. Dmitri is a safe and competent facilitator whose mastery and simple explanations make this seemingly complicated work accessible and relevant."
    - Dave Long, Milwaukee, WI

"Dmitri presents loving and gentle processes that can be used in carpet work and as a tool in other personal growth settings. Thank you!"
    - Gwen M. Hurd, LCSW, Chicago, IL

"Thank youfor creating such a dynamic training, and for presenting it from your heart!!!  It was an A-W-E-S-O-M-E experience!! I learned more about myself than I ever expected or anticipated!"
    - Jill Melvin, Palatine, IL

"This has been a great training, building on the basic course. It really helped me understand how people change, and how to facilitate them in that process. Thank you."
    - Bob Hudson, Colorado

"Wow! I'm absolutely fascinated by the depth of the Deep Change Facilitation Training. A 'must-have' for every facilitator's toolbox."
    - Neil Charlet

"This is ground-breaking work! The 'Deep Love' process and the 'Deep Risk' work goes through simple steps and yet, the change I experienced was very deep. I'm looking forward to taking this work to other women."
    - Arleen, Chicago

"Wow! The Deep Change processes are worth learning and practicing (and Dmitri's teaching and skills are truly outstanding). I recommend this training."
    - John Trenkle, Farmington Hills, MI

"Simple, powerful, dynamic. I made a significant transition on a core issue, and facilitated one for another participant!"
    - Rick Wells, San Diego, CA

"This is by far the best way to process. LOVE worked a lot better for me than anger work does! Love and connection is really what we all seek and this was a very deep way to heal love wounds."
    - Beth, Encinitos, CA

"I've had significant movement this weekend on issues I've worked on for years. Dmitri's tools are eloquent, deep, yet simple, and I am thrilled to add them to my facilitation toolkit.
   - Becca Linekin, San Diego, CA

"I recommend this workshop to therapists of any kind, counselors, phychologist, and people in helping and healing groups. Definitely for ManKind Project and Woman Within-ers."
    - Lainy Wells, La Jolla, CA

"It was great to see deep and lasting results from processes that are not necessarily dramatic or loud. This is a quiet, gentle and loving way to get to the bottom of issues that may have lingered for years, and not responded to the kinds of processes we are more used to seeing."
     - Judy Rudin, San Diego, CA

"This was extremely valuable, both for learning facilitation techniques and for personal growth. Being processed in terms of Deep Risk and Deep Love was an awesome experience."
    - David P., San Diego, CA

"The Deep Change Facilitation Training gave me a new perspective on facilitation and gave me simple tools I can use to help people get great insights and emotional breakthroughs."
     - Jonathan Rudin, San Diego, CA

"The Deep Change work allows me to more fully own the fact that we are not broken, and that even our shadows have gifts for us-- Love is all there is."
     - Annie Ory, San Diego, CA

"Wow! I am amazed by the depth that I and others were able to go to. These tools are now in both my facilitator toolbox and my personal toolbox. I definitely felt a deep movment at this weekend-- and I understand why."
     - Keith Craig, El Cajon, CA

"The Deep Change Facilitation Training was a wonderful experience for me. It gave me an opportunity to see that emotional work can be done in a softer, yet very powerful, way."
     - Susan DuCharme, El Cajon, CA

Who Can Come To The Deep Change Facilitation Training

When I first started thinking about offering this training, I was going to limit it to people who had done the Basic Carpet Work training, or who were MKP or WW leaders.

But as I thought about it I realized that, while these tools are advanced, they are also very simple. They address issues on such a basic level that I decided to open the workshop to any man or woman who has done either the New Warrior Weekend or the Woman Within Weekend. (Other people can come, but they need to talk to me first to make sure the training is right for them.)

But at the same time, be aware that this is advanced stuff. At this level of facilitation, you have to be willing to see every part of the person as good. You have to be willing to see every behavior they have, no matter how destructive it is, as an attempt to create safety of express love.

If you want to believe that some parts of a person are "just bad" and "need to be gotten rid of," that's fine -- but this training will not be for you.

Likewise, if you are unwilling to be open to the idea that your darkest parts may want the best for you -- and if you are unwilling to experience some shifts in your own relationship to your own Deep Risks and Deep Loves -- then you'll probably want to pass on this training, too.

While this training will be fun, it will move fast and go deep. Before you come to the training, you'll need to have read the pre-training material you'll be emailed about the basics of carpet work and about facilitating yourself. These lessons are brief and clear, and we will assume that you have an understanding of them before you come to the workshop.

If all that's okay with you, and if you want to learn to do deep work that changes people's entire point of view on themselves, and learn how to do it quickly, then you can sign up below.

Only 11 Spots Left as of January 23rd

I'm going to be spending some time in Colorado visiting some friends the week of the workshop, so I've decided that, in order to keep things simple and to keep my trip mellow, I'm going to keep this particular training small. 

I've already told a few people they can come, so at this point, for this small workshop, there are only 11 spots left. 

By the way, this workshop tends to fill up, and at 20 people: 

- The 2 times I've run it in Chicago it filled up early (with 20 participants and a waiting list), 

- When I ran it in Washington, DC it filled up early (with 20 participants and a waiting list), 

- and when I ran it in San Diego it filled up early (with 20 participants and a BIG waiting list!). 

If you know you want to come, do not wait 'til the last minute to sign up... With so few spaces, you may not get in.


Workshop Leader

This training will be led by me, Dmitri Bilgere. Here's a little about my background:

Dmitri Bilgere (August '88). Originally trained by Ron Hering and Cliff Barry, Dmitri is one of the original four founding Shadow Work facilitators. He has been leading Carpet Work facilitation trainings (of up to a week in length) and Shadow Work Seminars since 1991, all over the US, in Canada, England, and South Africa. 

Dmitri has co-led the Inner King Training 29 times, is a New Warrior Weekend senior staffer, and has taught facilitation to the New Warrior Leader Body. He's the author of "Beyond the Blame Game: Creating Compassion and Ending the Sex War in Your Life." 


Training Details

The Deep Change Facilitation Training takes place Saturday and Sunday, February 23-24, 2008, from 9am-5pm each day. It will be held at St. Anthony's Hospital (you'll be emailed directions after you sign up). The cost is $350; a $150 non-refundable deposit holds your place. If you miss the workshop after signing up, your non-refundable deposit can be used on any other training I run by myself.

The cost includes all pre-training materials and the take-home manual handed out at the workshop itself.

The Deep Change Facilitation Training is the first time I've share these facilitation tools in a workshop setting. If you want to be able to help other people (and yourself) through letting go of long-lasting, seemingly-unfixable issues, then you may way to sign up for this training by clicking the button below.

If you are on the fence about coming to the workshop, you may want to take a moment to re-read what other people have said about the training (in the yellow box, above). Otherwise, you can sign up right now at the link below. 

Signing Up For The Training
When you click the PayPal button below, you'll be taken to PayPal's secure ordering system, which will walk you through the process of paying your $150 non-refundable deposit. The balance of $200 will be payable by cash or check the morning of the workshop itself.

If this training seems right for you, I hope to see you there!


Dmitri Bilgere

P.S. I'm pretty well-known for giving away a lot of high-quality content about trainings I run, and this training is no exception. If you aren't ready to sign up for the Deep Change Facilitation Training, but you'd like me to keep you notified as I create more "give-aways," just put your name and email address below.

P.P.S. I hope this doesn't sound rude, but please don't ask for a discount on this training if you can find a way to afford to come.

I've made the cost very reasonable, and can break up your payments over time, if need be.

I'd like to take a few moments to put the cost of this training into perspective.

Adding it up, I find that in the last 18 months I've spent $9,650.80 going to workshops, trainings, and getting personal coaching. 

That includes paying $3,750.00 for one weekend and a series of follow-up calls -- not counting transportation to and hotel in the notoriously expensive San Francisco. (And it was totally worth it, by the way.)

And that's not including the $2,000.00 (plus airfare) I paid a few years ago for one day of coaching (which was also totally worth it).

I'm not a rich guy. I drive a 9-year old economy car. I don't own a house, I rent an apartment. I don't have big investments or mutual funds, though I'd like to. 

What I've realized is that the most important investment I can make is in myself. So I'm willing to spend my resources on training that makes my life better.

I'm not suggesting that you spend all your money on trainings and coaching, or that you behave irresponsibly. But I am suggesting that you value this workshop (and all the personal growth you do) as something important that is worthy of some financial investment.

For the past 17 years I have focused my life on finding the best, fastest ways to heal "stuck" issues. The Deep Change Facilitation Training is the first time I've taught these skills, and will get the information to you quickly -- so you can start using these tools in one weekend, rather than in 17 years.

If you've experienced any of my free online mini-courses, you know that I like to give away as much as I can, and that my material is solid and useful. But I must insist that you value this training and be willing to make some financial commitment to come to it. 

In return, the workshop is guaranteed -- if you come and find it's not for you, simply tell me by the end of the first day, and you'll get a full refund, no questions, no hassels. I really want this to be right for you, if you decide to come to it.

Signing Up For The Training
When you click the PayPal button below, you'll be taken to PayPal's secure ordering system, which will walk you through the process of paying your $150 deposit. The balance of $200 will be payable by cash or check the morning of the workshop itself.

Contact Dmitri Bilgere

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